The Joys of Cleaning

Cleaning CAN be exciting.

Notice I said CAN be.. not that IT IS.  

You know what I'm talking about.  You get that brand spanking new furniture polish that promises to make your furniture have the best shine ever and you cannot wait to go home and use that shit.  After 2 or 3 uses, its like wtf ever.  I gotta dust again?!  Damn it all to hell.  Talk about a day ruiner.  

Cleaning companies sure know how to target women.  They know new cleaning products wet our whistles.  A new product that will clean the shower and me not have to scrub!  Holy shit let me run out and buy it right now.  That was 3 years ago.  Now its in our local dumpster.

Notice how MR. clean is a MISTER?!  I call bullshit.  Where the hell is MRS. Clean?  Probably at home cleaning up after her bald ass husband. The asshole probably leaves hair all in the bathroom sink and bathroom counter from shaving that effing head.  

I got a new washer a few months ago.  I had to wait 2 days for them to deliver it.  I was so excited when it came. It has buttons... BUTTONS!  No turn knob!  It has lights and it tells you how many minutes left on your cycle.  A-effing -mazing.   I felt like the queen of Maytag as I put my first load in.  How exciting.  I all of a sudden LOVE doing laundry!  

You spilled a drink male spawn?  By all means.. get a clean towel. 

You want to play dress up female spawn?  By all means.. put your clean clothes in the dirty clothes when your done.  

Now.. 2 months later... I feel like the slave of Maytag.  More laundry?  Are you effing kidding me?